Friday, December 31, 2010

Bit By Bit

It's all right there, sitting in front of you,
The tools to create countless works of art
And publish them for the whole world to view.
They're waiting for you to pour out your heart,
Waiting for you to start using your voice.
So why aren't you saying anything? By
Just sitting there you've made the choice
To not create, and that means it's a lie
When you tell yourself that you could make it
If you just had the opportunity.
You can't make it because you can't commit
And because you lack the ability.
     My computer gives the world bit by bit
     To remind me I'm not worthy of it.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

I Represent

She claims that I don't speak for anyone,
That I act out of pure self-interest.
But she can't see the way so many run
To take my side, to join me on my quest.
We're ready to find a way out of this
Swamp of suppressive shame, leaving behind
Those who would wallow in their own abyss.
We will evolve and become a new kind,
We'll use the gifts we've been blessed with, and leave
Ruined the hate that used to make us doubt.
We'll triumph, because of what we perceive.
Next time she says I'm alone, I will shout
     A truth that you can mount on your steeple,
     I represent the beautiful people.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Epicurean, Unbowed

I refuse to be a cautionary
Tale, an example of hedonism's
Dark consequences. Fate will not bury
My pleasures in comeuppance, no schisms
Will cleave me from those whom I care for most.
There is no shame in pursuing pleasure,
So tell your father, son, and holy ghost
That I have found my own earthly treasure
And I will continue to enjoy all
That this life has allowed me to receive.
So I will take this joy on the long haul
All the way to the grave, 'cause I believe
     Pleasure begets pleasure, joy begets joy.
     There's so much out there, so I won't be coy.

Monday, November 22, 2010

To the Better Man

I know you think you've claimed your prize, and I
Wish I could congratulate you on your
Victory. But I know the facts, and my
Heart simply cannot be brought to ignore
The way she quivered when she held me close,
Her pulse racing as those thin arms tried to
Capture desires she could only expose
In those secret silent moments the two
Of us shared. I know that passion frightened
Her. It was the first time she lost control.
Now she's with you, holding back the heightened
Passions she knows you can't stir in her soul.
     She chose you out of cold calculation,
     And that is no cause for celebration.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

On the Occasion of Your Triumphant Return

The distance of an ocean is far less
Significant today than in the past.
It doesn't feel far when you can express
Whatever's on your mind in a quick blast
That travels, instantly, around the globe.
And so I've read your thoughts, I've seen your art,
Your voice has echoed in my prefrontal lobe,
But I still felt your absence in my heart.
Because some things can only be conveyed
When we share the same air, stand face to face,
When I can see your subtle signs displayed
In ways cameras cannot capture or trace.
     No simulacrum will ever explain
     How it will feel to embrace you again.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Let's Go

How far are you prepared to go in the
Pursuit of wild and reckless abandon?
Because I think it's high fucking time we
Scorch the sky like our joy was some new sun.
I want to set off something so stunning
Our names will turn to totems that future
Party people will invoke when gunning
For the greatest night of their lives. Let's tour
The border between too much and way, way
Too much. I'm prepared to make the edge a
Mere memory left behind, far away,
As we go hunting for the next hurrah.
     Take my hand and we will turn legends true.
     I could only have this much fun with you.

Friday, September 17, 2010

How He Does It

He comes equipped with an "ask forgiveness
Not permission" approach to boundaries.
He simply expects her to acquiesce
And if she gives him an inch, then he'll seize
Everything that lay before him, until
The word "no" finally falls from her lips.
Then his progress will halt, he will sit still,
His hands set like stone held on to her hips.
Though there is no forward motion, reverse
Doesn't begin until she demands it.
I can't comprehend how he can coerce
Them into giving more than they'd permit
     If he were to ask first, but I can tell
     It feels wrong to seduce with the hard sell.

Friday, September 10, 2010

The Gift of Johnny Irish

Cork seals the bottle that hangs from my neck
Where it was tied by a traveller three
Days prior. The tiny tincture's small speck
Of magic make it love potion, ready
To be imbibed by that special someone
And shared with me the moment we meet in
This dusty bacchanal. Oh then the fun
Will flow like fermented freedom and sin
Itself will stand awestruck at all we do.
So now it sits, resting against my chest,
Anxious for the moment it will bring true
Passion into this world. But it had best
     Be ready to wait a very long while,
     'Cause when I see her I'm too shy to smile.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Housewarming Blessing

Open this door as you'd open your heart
And step through this threshold prepared to smile.
You're in a place where silliness is smart
And the smart are fiendishly versatile.
This is a place where creation occurs,
Within these walls substance makes out with style,
Lost in the glitter and feathers and furs.
Where wisdom will find new ways to beguile
The beautiful and bewitch the brazen,
Inviting the muse and the inventor.
Are you ready to see all that lays in
Wait once you allow yourself to enter?
     You'll find a free-form feast for the fickle
     In the fabulous home of the tickle.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Oh Hell Yes

It's time to get in way over our heads,
To rush face first into the blinding light
With the full force throttle of thoroughbreds
Making the leap, holding each other tight.
It's time to roll around in the dirt of
The garden of eden, fucking in filth
So precious you can trade it for true love.
Throw out all sense of shame, all sense of stealth,
They should be able to hear us coming
And know, when we arrive, that they'll witness
Passion so powerful hearts are humming
In anticipation of feeling this.
     We'll love each other with pyrrhic fury,
     And we won't stop 'till we turn to debris.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

She's Out There

I'm ready for the way that things will be
Once we have finally found each other.
I'm ready for the time we'll disagree
About the funniest way to bother
The missionaries at your door until
We finally compromise, deciding
That I'll wear the sequined thong and you will
Wear the gorilla suit. So stop hiding
In the potential and come out to play.
I'm ready for the inside jokes we'll share.
Ready to hold you as night becomes day.
Ready with the touch that will take you there,
      Remembering fondly when we first kissed.
     I'm ready to believe that you exist.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Can't Stop, Won't Stop

I am gonna make it through this year, but
I really wish I wouldn't. It would be
Much easier to pass than to face what
Is waiting in that dark future for me.
I can't comprehend how I will make it
Through twenty to forty more years of this.
But I know that I'm unable to quit
Even though I've lost my last chance at bliss.
Day will follow day, night will follow night,
And I wil be thrust through them with the force
Of pure inertia, and all of my might
Won't be able to stop me on this course.
     Life is long, with poor resolution
     I just want a permanent solution.

Friday, June 25, 2010

The Gift

I was once given a gift. It was two
Days after we'd had a huge fight and she
Surprised me. Almost too good to be true.
Dumbstruck at what had been given to me.
It was, quite possibly, her greatest act
Of love, and I knew just how much it meant,
Or at least I thought I did. Now the fact
That I was given this gift will torment
Me until my dying day. I still wish
That she had never loved me quite that much.
But she did, so I eat the bitter dish
And try like hell to forget the warm touch.
     The reason that gift cuts me to the bone
     Is that I couldn't earn it on my own.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Little Plastic Wrappers

Little plastic wrappers litter the waste-
Basket that hides in the corner of my
Bathroom. Little plastic memories taste
Of all the times that came before goodbye,
When he and she and they and me let loose
All the passion that was hidden within,
The way the sunrise would always seduce,
Pulling at them once we'd satisfied skin,
Leaving behind only little plastic
Wrappers, the waste meant to be discarded.
I'd trade every one for the fantastic
Feeling of waking up in a shared bed,
     But no one will trade for all my excess,
     'Cause little plastic wrappers are worthless.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010


Each of us has a garden of eden
Hidden somewhere in the plains of our past.
There was a place and there was a time when
Happiness hit heavy and joy was vast.
Now your memories can barely contain
All of the laughter you shared, and so it
Spills out as a grin that you can't explain
To anyone who wasn't there. We get
Our time in eden, but that time must pass.
And once we leave we can never go back,
Never laugh like that, never feel the grass
Between our toes. That joy we'll always lack.
     I've stopped searching for eden, I've lost her.
     Now I search for something even better.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

For M

The world is a hell of a lot better
Because there are people like you in it.
'Cause you're one of those souls that can set her
Mind to task and make the world get to it.
I'm certain that if you decided to
Make mountains move that in time we would see
The continents taking orders from you,
And if you decided that it would be
Better if the sun weren't so bright I'm sure
You'd find a way to get a dimmer switch
Installed in the sky. Your words are the cure
For apathy. You're a stone badass bitch.
     I know, from what you'd done and what you've said,
     There's an empire of awesome in your head.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

13 Blessings

May you find joy in everything you do.
May all who greet you do so in good will.
May every word of praise you hear be true.
May you always have a dream to fulfill.
May your nights be known as legendary.
May all your days be completely worthwhile.
May pain only come when necessary.
And may its lessons never dull your smile.
May love always be able to find you.
May jealousy never darken your door.
May your rewards never be overdue.
May you create art too great to ignore.
     And many years after you cease to be,
     May people still smile in your memory.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

For N

You've got a smile that could jump-start engines
And a laugh that would make hell seem all right
If I heard it there. Now this just begins
The long list of all the ways you bring light
And joy like champagne bottles bring bubbles,
Flowing forth for everyone to enjoy.
You don't just make me forget my troubles,
I forget what the word "troubles" means. Toy-
Sized and terrific, I'm happy to say
That I've been blessed with the chance to spend time
In this world with a girl who makes the day
So much brighter, who is truly sublime.
     And since you shine like the sun at high noon,
     I'd like for us to get drinks sometime soon.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Consumed By

I don't know how to react anymore.
And I wouldn't even be able to
Fake it if I did. So when I saw your
Silhouette on the horizon I knew
My only option was escape. And so
I fled, flying fast from memories that
Played like a painful, perverse picture show
In my mind. The way we both saw combat
And called it love, our pitched battles that left
Nothing but casualties on every side.
All that we gained was the mutual theft
Of each other's happiness. So I hide
     Myself away until you have passed through.
     To avoid the fact that I still love you.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Lamar Ped Bridge #1

I suppose I will write a sonnet. On
This bridge overlooking the beautiful
River, watching the rare midnight stroll drawn
Past my vantage point. Lovers in the full
And furious act of discovery,
Each new exchange giving another chance
To find that they are matched so perfectly,
To dream about the day they'll visit France,
And quickly walk away from the weird guy
Looking at them from the ledge. I can hear
The city's slumber, I can feel it lie
Down for a short break, to shake off the fear.
     And now the bridge asks, as I stand on it.
     Will I jump, or will I write a sonnet?

Friday, April 9, 2010

Belated for Her

You're an endless source of smiles, a fountain
Flowing free with waterfalls of wonder
Cascading like rivers from the mountain.
Your voice can bring my glee out from under
The darkest of clouds and cause it to soar.
And I know that I'm overstating things
Right now, making caricature of your
Grace, complicated and true. It still stings
When I consider that, if not for my
Misplaced desires, I might still be with you.
You've found happiness now, and I just sigh.
When you see me, just know this much is true--
     Of those whose love has pierced my heart's great wall
     You'll always be the fairest of them all.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Fashion Plate

This is the outfit I've been waiting for.
The couture that can propel me from dull
And dreary to sharpest man on the floor.
The clothes that cause ladies to pause and mull
Their chances of getting me out of them.
Oh yes, they'd look as fine on your floor as
They do clinging to my form. From the hem
Of the pant leg, all the way up, it says
"I look better than you, I must admit."
So I approach my love, and with a wink
And a smile I allow her to take it
All in. Then I ask "Well what do you think?"
     She looks me over and says with a sigh,
     "That's a lot of purple for a white guy."

Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Love Letter I Shouldn't Write

This is the love letter I shouldn't write
A mistake in the making, each pen stroke
Sending me further out into a tide
That will swallow me. I'll go up in smoke
When I fall into your flame. I will waste
Away when I find no sustenance so
Sweet as the fine flavor that I can taste
On your lips. If you ask me, I will go
To the sun and mock it for not shining
As brightly as you. In your lightning storm
I'll stand taller to see silver lining
And if you strike me I will feel so warm.
     I hope you can hear this love that I shout,
     And I hope your boyfriend doesn't find out.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Do Something

I know what I can do. I can feel the
Force of all my potential energy,
Like champagne waiting for its cork to be
Twisted just a touch so it can push free.
But so far that little twist hasn't come
I sit idle and unable to make
Use of what I have. I simply succumb
To my weaknesses and let the time take
Away my dreams, every second a thief.
Every minute a monster, consuming
My future as I sit in disbelief,
Too scared of the risk to begin blooming.
     I've got to do something. I've got to try.
     This is not the way that I want to die.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Two Against One

They call me a wolf, and they aren't lying.
I never said I was anything else,
And I'll tell you right right now that I'm trying
To get you nude and pleasure all the cells
That have blessed the world by becoming you.
I want to put a smile on your face and
A wet spot on your sheets. You know it's true.
But what do they want, the couple who stand
So close to you, who try to put me down?
Yea they're your friends, but then so am I, and
They say they just want you to hang around.
They'll invite you home, like it wasn't planned.
     They share in my goals, they want the same fun.
     This isn't fair play, it's two against one.

Thursday, February 18, 2010


The first time we embraced I couldn't tell
Which was was up. I was delirious
With possibility, hoping like hell
That you were right--this could get serious.
The next time we embraced the planet stopped
Moving just long enough for us to share
A night that you told me couldn't be topped.
I knew what that implied, I didn't care.
The last time we embraced I wanted to
Know why I didn't know and how you could
Keep it from me. Some stupid secret grew
Into proof that you never understood.
     Now you are leaving and I will not chase
     Because I reject your shallow embrace.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

There Is No Synthroid in the Apocalypse

Nine pills rattle reckless at the very
Bottom of their bottle. Four-and-a-half
Days supply, and then no more. I carry
Their container, held together with gaff
Tape that covers a label that once bore
My name. Four-and-a-half days, then they're gone.
And I will wander this wasteland no more.
I have five more mornings to catch the dawn.
Four more nights of moonlight bathing my skin,
Comforting a heart that's destined to stop.
But I have an advantage, I know when
It's last beat will come. I'll dance 'till I drop
     Celebrating sunset. Know this my friends--
     Life is a gift no matter how it ends.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

True Romance

The most romantic thing I've ever heard
Escaped from her lips during the orgy,
Her voice raspy, shuddering every word,
"You're the only one I want inside me."
And it was as though pleasure suddenly
Had its own gravity, and we became
Mere satellites in orbit around the
Hands he used to take hold of her hips. Flame
Filled up the ever-diminishing space
Between them until it was smothered by
The collision of want and need. Her face
Full of joy, new clarity in his eye.
     Years later they're together, no regret
     Though they don't tell the children where they met.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Jessie and Charley

I've never seen such concern in her eyes.
Tears swell like tides. Subtle. Overwhelming.
She's unable to keep up the disguise
Of the fun-time friend who can't see the thing
Consuming him slowly from inside-out.
She wants to be the strength that he's missing
To learn what his sickness is all about,
As though knowledge could stop him from pissing
Away the life that she finds so precious,
That he's escaping like an old burden.
It's too late, though, when she tries to discuss
'Cause he wrote these words to her in the end--
     "Don't call it love when it looks like pity
     Fucking give up on trying to save me."

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

I Am Not Weak

It's that special feeling deep down inside
When you realize that she doesn't feel the
Same way that you feel about her. You hide
The awful ache and wonder what could be
Worse than this. Or perhaps it's more like when
You find that all of your friends have moved on,
You'll never be so close to them again,
What you called family was illusion
And now you have to face your life alone.
That's the tide rising around my ankles,
The winds of this emotional cyclone.
I know this feeling is the one that culls
     The weak and tortured souls that cannot see--
     Even at its darkest, life is beauty.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Kiss & Tell

I'm much better at kissing than talking.
I can communicate so much more when
My voice is still and my lips are walking
Softly up to the nape of your neck than
I could ever hope to do with these words
That seem to only be good for masking
What we really mean. Like when we were birds,
My lips were tearful confessors, asking
Questions they didn't want to hear answered,
And though our words said everything was fine
It was with my lips that the truth was heard.
I was not yours, and you could not be mine.
     It was the purest way to feel that pain.
     You won't taste the truth on my lips again.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

So I Still Have Your...

My nightstand carries a collection of
Jetsam, cast adrift when waters were wild.
The things they took off before making love
To me are ever-so-neatly compiled
In that special corner, should their owners
Ever decide they need the stray hair pin,
The rogue left earring, that scrunchie of hers.
Yet somehow the pile never seems to thin,
New nights of passion leaving deposits
That sensible mornings somehow forget.
I'm left feeling confused by this, 'cause it's
Some kind of sign I don't understand yet.
     So I'll continue sorting carefully
     Until such time that someone will claim me.