The Gift

I was once given a gift. It was two
Days after we'd had a huge fight and she
Surprised me. Almost too good to be true.
Dumbstruck at what had been given to me.
It was, quite possibly, her greatest act
Of love, and I knew just how much it meant,
Or at least I thought I did. Now the fact
That I was given this gift will torment
Me until my dying day. I still wish
That she had never loved me quite that much.
But she did, so I eat the bitter dish
And try like hell to forget the warm touch.
     The reason that gift cuts me to the bone
     Is that I couldn't earn it on my own.

Little Plastic Wrappers

Little plastic wrappers litter the waste-
Basket that hides in the corner of my
Bathroom. Little plastic memories taste
Of all the times that came before goodbye,
When he and she and they and me let loose
All the passion that was hidden within,
The way the sunrise would always seduce,
Pulling at them once we'd satisfied skin,
Leaving behind only little plastic
Wrappers, the waste meant to be discarded.
I'd trade every one for the fantastic
Feeling of waking up in a shared bed,
     But no one will trade for all my excess,
     'Cause little plastic wrappers are worthless.

Eden

Each of us has a garden of eden
Hidden somewhere in the plains of our past.
There was a place and there was a time when
Happiness hit heavy and joy was vast.
Now your memories can barely contain
All of the laughter you shared, and so it
Spills out as a grin that you can't explain
To anyone who wasn't there. We get
Our time in eden, but that time must pass.
And once we leave we can never go back,
Never laugh like that, never feel the grass
Between our toes. That joy we'll always lack.
     I've stopped searching for eden, I've lost her.
     Now I search for something even better.

For M

The world is a hell of a lot better
Because there are people like you in it.
'Cause you're one of those souls that can set her
Mind to task and make the world get to it.
I'm certain that if you decided to
Make mountains move that in time we would see
The continents taking orders from you,
And if you decided that it would be
Better if the sun weren't so bright I'm sure
You'd find a way to get a dimmer switch
Installed in the sky. Your words are the cure
For apathy. You're a stone badass bitch.
     I know, from what you'd done and what you've said,
     There's an empire of awesome in your head.

13 Blessings

May you find joy in everything you do.
May all who greet you do so in good will.
May every word of praise you hear be true.
May you always have a dream to fulfill.
May your nights be known as legendary.
May all your days be completely worthwhile.
May pain only come when necessary.
And may its lessons never dull your smile.
May love always be able to find you.
May jealousy never darken your door.
May your rewards never be overdue.
May you create art too great to ignore.
     And many years after you cease to be,
     May people still smile in your memory.

For N

You've got a smile that could jump-start engines
And a laugh that would make hell seem all right
If I heard it there. Now this just begins
The long list of all the ways you bring light
And joy like champagne bottles bring bubbles,
Flowing forth for everyone to enjoy.
You don't just make me forget my troubles,
I forget what the word "troubles" means. Toy-
Sized and terrific, I'm happy to say
That I've been blessed with the chance to spend time
In this world with a girl who makes the day
So much brighter, who is truly sublime.
     And since you shine like the sun at high noon,
     I'd like for us to get drinks sometime soon.

Consumed By

I don't know how to react anymore.
And I wouldn't even be able to
Fake it if I did. So when I saw your
Silhouette on the horizon I knew
My only option was escape. And so
I fled, flying fast from memories that
Played like a painful, perverse picture show
In my mind. The way we both saw combat
And called it love, our pitched battles that left
Nothing but casualties on every side.
All that we gained was the mutual theft
Of each other's happiness. So I hide
     Myself away until you have passed through.
     To avoid the fact that I still love you.

Lamar Ped Bridge #1

I suppose I will write a sonnet. On
This bridge overlooking the beautiful
River, watching the rare midnight stroll drawn
Past my vantage point. Lovers in the full
And furious act of discovery,
Each new exchange giving another chance
To find that they are matched so perfectly,
To dream about the day they'll visit France,
And quickly walk away from the weird guy
Looking at them from the ledge. I can hear
The city's slumber, I can feel it lie
Down for a short break, to shake off the fear.
     And now the bridge asks, as I stand on it.
     Will I jump, or will I write a sonnet?

Belated for Her

You're an endless source of smiles, a fountain
Flowing free with waterfalls of wonder
Cascading like rivers from the mountain.
Your voice can bring my glee out from under
The darkest of clouds and cause it to soar.
And I know that I'm overstating things
Right now, making caricature of your
Grace, complicated and true. It still stings
When I consider that, if not for my
Misplaced desires, I might still be with you.
You've found happiness now, and I just sigh.
When you see me, just know this much is true--
     Of those whose love has pierced my heart's great wall
     You'll always be the fairest of them all.

Fashion Plate

This is the outfit I've been waiting for.
The couture that can propel me from dull
And dreary to sharpest man on the floor.
The clothes that cause ladies to pause and mull
Their chances of getting me out of them.
Oh yes, they'd look as fine on your floor as
They do clinging to my form. From the hem
Of the pant leg, all the way up, it says
"I look better than you, I must admit."
So I approach my love, and with a wink
And a smile I allow her to take it
All in. Then I ask "Well what do you think?"
     She looks me over and says with a sigh,
     "That's a lot of purple for a white guy."